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When I logged on to vote for the NHL All-Star game, I was confronted with “Vote Early, Vote OFTEN,” which made me jump up, wondering what the fuck.

“So you mean some douchebag from anywhere in the world can just sit in his bathrobe online repeatedly voting for the same player!” I say.

There was something redolent about this slogan, I thought, of some recent foulness that got me to thinking of when I first heard Rod Blagojevich was carrying on a pay-to-play game with his clientele.

I wonder if Blago had something to do with this shady voting decision, because there are three Chicago players in the starting line-up, and no Detroit players at all.

I remember a news story reporting that Sidney Crosby had broken the all-time record for total number of all-star votes. How could that could even be a legitimate record, as there was no limit to how much one person could vote, let alone something for a hockey player to cherish? (I guess he can keep that award next to the no Stanley Cup in his trophy chest).

Anyway, I had hoped for a little variety in the starting line-up, but all the NHL’s got, foax, is a four-way circle-jerk between Montreal, Chicago, Pittsburgh and Anaheim. (The fact that Montreal players are in the starting line-up is inevitable, if not preferable, as the game will happen there.)

The “Vote Early, Vote Often” campaign didn’t just snub Detroit players, like Pavel Datsyuk (who is a skills-competition must) and Nicklas Lidstrom, but the likes of Alex Ovechkin, Jeff Carter, Patrick Marleau, Thomas Vanek, Big Joe Thornton, Jerome Iginla, Mark Savard, etc. etc.

It comes as no surprise, really, that those teams would be represented, especially Pittsburgh and Chicago who have received a hell of a lot of hype this year. 

So on behalf of disgruntled fans who only voted once—and know it’s not a big deal—here’s a very happy fuck-you to the NHL and a thank-you for giving me one more reason to feel rotten this year. And by the way, I’m pretty sure Detroit’s (ex)Mayor can beat up Illionois’ governor Blagojevich.

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